What is Tantric Sex?

Basics about Tantra

Sex isn't some new thing that was invented in recent history. We all know this, but we tend to imagine that sex has been mainly about procreation and not about enjoyment until recent times. But the idea that sex could be for pleasure, and for personal and spiritual growth, is ancient. There are a wide variety of ways of thinking about sex that are radically different from the current North American approach. One of the oldest approaches is Tantra.

What is Tantra?

One translation of the word Tantra is "tools for expansion." Tantra is over 1500 years old, and like yoga it originated in India. It is a set of teachings and practices that are specifically designed to help us feel more, to increase our awareness of our own energy and the energy around us. The path that Tantra uses to these ends is the exploration of sexual energy.

The goal of Tantric sex is to allow us to experience more depth and breadth in our sexuality. The goal is not necessarily orgasm, but rather enriching the whole sexual experience.

Is Tantra a Religion?

While traditional Tantric teachings refer to concepts such as �universal energy� or �higher power� the teachings are, in many cases, not about stubbornly sticking to one set of beliefs or rules. If you are interested in the idea of sexual expression bringing you closer to a higher power, you will find much in Tantra that speaks to you. If you are looking for a way to enhance or deepen your sexual connection with your partner, Tantra can offer many wonderful opportunities without requiring that you follow any specific set of beliefs.

Who is Tantric Sex Good For?

Many of the teachings are about desire and the experience of sexual energy. Unlike western approaches to improving your sex life, Tantra teachings do not focus on external evaluations of what our body looks like, what kind of car we drive, how we wear our hair. In this way Tantric sex teaching are open to anyone who is interested in exploring a new path to sexual fulfillment.

Incorporating ideas of Tantra into your sex life can be something anyone does, regardless of age, sexual orientation, and what your body looks, like, how it feels, how it moves, etc�

 

What are Chakras?

Tantra distinguishes many different energy systems within us. One of these that you might have already read about is chakras; energy centers in the body between the pelvis and the top of the head. In this system of thought, there is the idea that the smooth flow of energy in our bodies can get stuck somewhere in the system blocked from moving freely or depleted for a variety of reasons. Tantric practice works toward keeping energy flowing through us smoothly and naturally.

What is Tantric Sex Like?

Tantra is different from western ideas about sex in some other important ways. The western concept of sex is like a story with a clear beginning (sexual excitement), middle (penetration), and end (orgasm). This is the way it�s supposed to be and if you don�t follow the story, something is wrong. Sex without penetration is often viewed as being "not real� or �merely� foreplay.

In Tantric sex the point of sex is not orgasm, the point is to feel. There is no clear cut beginning middle or end. Most of the exercises related to Tantric sex involve slowing things down, trying not to focus on our external body, or orgasm, or anything outside of our experience of the moment.

Without a focus on orgasm, the goal becomes increased awareness leading to greater understanding of ourselves, which eventually leads to enlightenment. There is no pressure to "get over the top". This doesn't mean that orgasm doesn't exist in Tantra, it just isn't the be all and end all. The spiritual practice and the good sexual feelings are inter-related, each leading back to, and improving the other.

What Tantric sex �looks like� will be different for different people. Tantra is taught by many teachers around the world, who have their own take on it, influenced by the cultures they grew up in. Certainly a key feature of Tantric sex is the importance of breathing, and slowing down sexual behavior compared to the hectic, orgasm-focused North American approach.

Tantric Sex: Basic Technique

The fundamental premise in tantric sex is that when the sexual energy travels up the spine (instead of out the penis) the result is greater and more lasting pleasure, a clearer mind, a more creative life, and a source of unlimited love.

Most jokes about sex are related to sexual dysfunction. We can view tantric sex then as aimed at sexual function, or increased function or increased efficiency of action.

As in regular yoga asana (posture), the arrangement of the two bodies, male and female, and the action of the breath (breathing patterns) are fundamental to achieving good results.

BASIC TECHNIQUE, JUST 3 PARTS
1. In hatha yoga classes there is a short series of exercises called "Sun Salutations" or "Salutation to the Sun". Prior to getting into bed, or starting foreplay, but when the energy of desire is high, performi ng (at least) 3 complete sun salutations together in the bedroom is a very useful pre-requisite to encouraging the energy to travel up the spine. This is also very useful in cases where the male tends to ejaculate too soon. Try it! You can find hatha yoga classes just about anywhere, including videos and DVD. You may find that after the short set of yoga the desire seems to cool, don't worry - there's always another wave.

2. The beginning position for tantric sex is called 'yab-yum' , with the man seated in what is called half-lotus position (similar to crossed legs) and the woman straddled over the man. This position is chosen for function (as opposed to dysfunction). This position affords the male greatest control over the ejaculatory response, and by itself can remedy what is considered to be premature ejaculation. The greater control over biology provided by this position also allows the act of lovemaking to be prolonged indefinitely, which allows for ex tended sexual exploration.

3. The third unique aspect of tantric sex is the breathing patterns. Again, I refer you to a Hatha yoga 101 and the breathing pattern called 'Ocean Breath'. The man and woman, arrange themselves in the yab-yum position, desire is high, and they begin by breathing in & out of each others bodies: while the man exhales through the nose, the woman draws/sips the mans breath in through her nose. And vice versa. If you have never tried this, you may find it is more intoxicating than kissing. To understand the relationship between breath/desire/pleasure/arousal, this is what you seek.